clueless

Just another face in the crowd
Waiting
Patiently
Im slowly losing my mind
Withdrawing
Within me
That scream from somewhere
Where?
Inside?
Look at me
Look at me!!!
Can’t you see me?!

If I make it as a designer, the first thing I would do is to design a toilet cum study room. Not only will there be a toilet roll, there will also be a butter paper roll and a small shelve for stationery. There will be a desk that can be stored away by flipping it to the side and yes, a space for a laptop. This idea may sound ridiculous and absurd to you but it’s a brilliant idea to me. Why? The toilet is my source of inspiration. If norain says im her muse (which I don’t think its true), then the toilet is my definitely muse.. If it weren’t for the drawings and the text that I have to read, I would have definitely spent longer time thinking in the toilet. Wonderful poems and ideas were popping into my mind but as soon as I step out of the toilet, everything gets flushed away.. and I meant my ideas ok.. sheesh, you guys are disgusting.

Anyway, im having a hell of a time reading the text that the old dude gave me. “Representation and Sexuality”, nothing erotic about it other than the fact that the words subjectivity, masculine and feminine kept being reiterated in the text. My brain just cant seem to make sense of the long sentences, and I cant believe that there is such a word as complementarity. Such big words for a small person like me. I feel like dumping the text and not finishing it but that’s a cowardly deed. You should always finish what you start even though it bores you to death. No wonder the old dude always have long sentences in his brief. He has long since exposed himself to the overbearing theorists and philosophers who wants to explain everything in one sentence and that sentence has to be full of big words which seem to mean other stuff. Ok, that was just an example of how long a long sentence could be. Hehehe.. yes, yes, lame..

So does anybody know how to start the theory draft? Im clueless man. Really, for once I do not know what to write. Im really losing the writing spirit (as though I had one in the first place yar?). Haiz, fine, I’ll try to finish reading the text. Maybe after that I will get inspiration and then I will embark on a dangerous mission to fulfill the 1000 word quota for the theory draft without going insane. Don’t even dare to think that im insane right now. I mean it. Ciao..