Oh my God...

What the hell!!!! I stayed up until 1 am just to watch Arsenal get beaten by Man Utd...What shit man....Man Utd palyed rough, they cheated especially Van Nistelrooy...Oh i felt like strangling him when he pushed and hit Ljungberg,or was it Ashley? Huh, cant remember...stupid, F**king referee,he kept giving stupid yellow cards to arsenal players....What the HELL man...God, im soo pissed....Ok i think t'd better stop ranting on hte stupid, unfair match with the F**king Man Utd.
Hate Nistelrooy to the core man......

Ok....i've thought about this all the time and i really have to write it down, well, about life, death and dreams....Yup...i feel that life is a very vicious cycle..hey,you know what, i dont have the philosophical mood right now...im soo exhausted man...i'll write in when im feeling more fresh...
Ciao....

What the F.....

hey...today could be counted as the worst day of my f**king life. Imagine having to think of your concept panels, your F**king RWP ppt wich my group has not done yet and having to think of what time to go home and what to cook for the blahdy people at home. Im soooooo sorry for shouting at junxian but he should have asked norain and not me.......yar...now everyone will hate me for shouting at them but they dont know that im having a hell of a time coping with stuff at home and school. What is it with people....just because im nice they expect me to be nice all the time is it? I have my f**king problems and i have to think of people's feelings? Who cares about mine?
Yes...i admit that i do get pissed or hurt when people shout at me for no reason(Cos i always do that to others) but i dont keep it in mind cos i know, everyone has their bad and good moods.....I know im not perfect....im not trying to be perfect...i know that i scream at people and i always hurt their feelings but i DONT MEAN IT.......If i dont like the person, i will not talk to the person at all.......
And i dont get what's up with that blahdy bitchy f**king 2nd sister of mine....she expects me to cook and she doesn't help.....and she got the cheeks to eat the food that i cook when she had stayed cooped up in her room playing gameboy....She thinks im her maid....F**k off man...i hope she fails her F**king N level....I mean it...she doesn't treat me like her big sister at all....One day im gonna give her a tight slap on her UGLY face and she's gonna regret raising her voice at me,
Tell you something, im the nicest sister in the world ok,Im not kidding...i cook for my younger sisters cos i love them(except for my 2nd sis) and i dont want them to go hungry.....im sorry that i cant help them with their homework and im sorry that i cant spend time talikng to them...Im sorry that i cant be a better big sister.....
I cant stand being in this family any longer..they expect me to think of them when they never think of how i feel at all...Mom and dad always expect me to be there...what if i die 1 day, who else is gonna take care of them?I cant always be there...I've got school to think about...i've got my own dreams...why do i have to put family in the 1st place....I want freedom from all this responsibility...its not fair cos they're heaping all the troubles at me...Why am i the oldest daughter...y do i have to be a girl in the first place?
Im praying to God every day, so that i can tahan all the crap that i get from the people around me.Im gonna make it big some day and im gonna leave all the shit behind...even if the shit is my family.....call me ungrateful but if i list all the blahdy things that had happened to me..you'll change your mind dude.....
Last words....im gonna buy a penthouse someday and live far, far, far away from my family(of course i'll send mum and dad money) and im gonna live alone...yes...peace at last...nirvana...
So shoot me if i dont achieve this dream of mine.....

What a shame....

Yup...what a shame...i couldn't finish my model on time...i feel kinda numb fight now....i feel like crying but what's the use?Like what norain said,the old FOD might be laughing at us now...haiz... think i'll heal my broken heart,my hurt pride in the toilet later....my dream of seeing my model completed is just a dream...it will be such a disgrace during presentation...imagine me with a half done model...The HORROR........klah....like i said...i have to go for the healing tretment now...
ciao.....

The Beginning....

Hey...today is the fasting month...Im feeling kinda blue today...Haiz...i dont feel like thinking much(well,im not thinking much anyway) but it suddenly occured to me in the bus ride just now, how fake my life is,how fake i am...everything i am and was is a farce..Hehe,you must be thinking that i've lost it completely yar?But who cares about what you think?Definitely not me..

I mean, there's so many layers to the facade that im putting that im not sure now which is the real me?Is the nasty,sarcastic,foul mouth girl the real me or the quiet,shy(yes...this im not kidding...) and...what else..haiz...i dont know lah...But am i putting up a facade in the first place?
I dont think so..Really, im showing myyself as i truly am to others...I never lie about myself, about how i feel...i think im not making sense right now.

Anyway, i was standing at the train station at je..it was so crowded and everyone was rushing to get in the train(except me as usual) and right then,i felt like laughing out loud at all those idiots.
Those idiots or rather clowns who are trying their very best to fit in the damn train. HAHAHA to them all.....and i felt like lying down in the middle of the platform...i feel like mocking them...i feel like denying the existence of work...ok..im scaring myself now...i'll write in when i've fully recovered from this state of paranoia,depression and not to forget...what is it? Insanity? Ciao...

Haiz...

Woah....finally i get to change my blog template....thank god!It was so lame last time.Anyway,tonight im stuck in the studio with the AFM members...hehehe...with the honorary member too...I've just finished my 2d drawings and my RWP(well not really for RWP) At last...after much brainstorming (or mind mapping as d FOD says it) i have finished,its completed...yeah...But the sad thing is i havent bought the materials for the model..--..Maybe i should ask my dad for money now...hmm??By the way,this afternoon's TOD lecture was the nicest seh(maybe because its the last lecture..heh)The old FOD made another mistake again..instead of saying 'thought', he said 'chot'...Hahahaha...that was soo funny..it was closhing last time...hehe..And norain made another lame joke again...heh,cheesy n lame joke...but the worst lame joke was the centrepoint joke...my god...how lame can you get norain?Hehe...just kidding ar....Ok...i'll write in when im not busy, well,mostly because norain wants me to accompany her to the toilet(she's scared of the dark actually...hehe..) Ciao..