Earth hour today at 8.30pm

So yesterday was the checkup at NUH for mum, after the ultrascan and the mammogram, we found out that she has 2 small lumps about 1cm size in her right breast. Will need to go for needle biopsy next week to check whether its benign or its the other thing. I dont know what to think or feel. Mum tried to look calm but i can see the worries forming in her eyes, even after both of us try to comfort ourselves that its nothing. Because of her age, she's turning 50 this year, and because she's prone to get sick easily, i cant help but worry. I really, really pray to God that this is nothing serious. I cannot imagine, in fact i dont want to think of negative stuffs for now.

Sometimes i wonder, wouldnt it be nice if we were still toddlers? Not knowing and understanding things would make life pretty much simple and stress free right?

dont you think the grass is always greener on the other side? no matter what people say, or no matter if the truth was told, somewhere in the back of your mind, the grass is always greener. maybe its just human nature to be envious of others and greedy, not happy or satisfied with what they have. Where am i going with this post actually? no idea.

one day i will meet you and tell you how cool you guys are.. well i'll just be satisfied if i get to see you guys perform live. Soo.. till then, DBSK FIGHTING!!!!

* runs off to sing along to all DBSK songs, My destiny on repeat 1000 x times.

(kind of in a melancholic mode now, please leave me in peace for today and tomorrow since i dont give a donkey's arse on what's happening over there, well at least until monday lah)

Miane yeobo~~~

Im so devastated! really, really heartbroken and angry, soo pissed off with myself. Why? i remember, the last day i saw u was on tuesday, a quick peek to make sure you're there. But then i forgot about you until yesterday...the nice dinner i had was totally ruined when i found out you were gone...

WHY????

i lost you my mini yunnie ssi...waaaaa~~...where are your right now??? i hope you're not lying on the ground somewhere on tampines one site out of all places...NOOOOOO!!!

i feel so guilty...for forgetting and losing you..Miane yeobo..you're definitely not in the office cos i certainly wont leave u in the office, but ic ant find you at home either...what the fuck sehh...and if mum finds out that the new ezlink attached to you is gone, im SO gonna get an earful...

But what is that pain compared to my heart which is breaking into a million pieces as the days go by without seeing you so close to me...?? (*_*)


* runs off, arms flailing, into my secret Yunnie shrine...Miane yunnie!!!

Sorry, Sorry, Sorry, Sorry

(i wished that it was me yunnie was leaning onto...shhhh, dont tell jae..;p)

i finally remembered what it was that compelled me to research about YunJae resulting in my current obsession over anything Yunjae related.

Its those videos of their interviews i watched in order to get to know DBSK after listening to purple line & mirotic. After watching a few, i realised that those 2 would always, always look at each other whenever they talk or answer the interviewer's questions. I was amazed at the amount of eye contact that they made through out the whole interview. How can i express this immense feeling of adoration and, and love??

You know, whenever i look at the boys wallpaper on my pc, i get this constricting feeling in my chest, i feel happy tapi macam nak nangis. This is the first time i've had this kind of feeling. Even with LP, it wasnt to this extent. Do i need help or is this really what you call....

a fan girl love????

Dun, dun, dunnnnn.....suspense eh?

Anyway, putting aside my crazy love for Yunjae for a minute, right now Im really crazy over Super Junior's Sorry,Sorry song. Its so fucking addictive i tell you. i've been putting it on repeat everytime i listen to it. And the boys look damn cool although i still think Siwon looks greasy ,i've tried to convince myself otherwise but after watching the video for the 4th time, he's still greasy. Ryeowook, Sungmin, Dong Hae and Kyuh hyun look soo cool. Too bad Hankyung & Eeteuk oppa didnt sing much if not we'd get to see more of their faces in the video.. Why??!! they look so damn hot in suits mah... ook, enough of Suju spazzing...

*run off to look for clearer YunJae Nagoya team pix..<3